Yeah, I took a day off…. I didn’t bother coming to work yesterday. I was tired and, honestly, why bother? Anyway, as sad as I am to say it, I’m back at work. I really can’t take it that much longer. The whole thing. Not just work. Life in Kuwait, in general. The whole thing blows and sucks at the same time.
I really have to get out of here (Kuwait). Living here sucks the life out of me (physically as well as mentally). Its like some kind of new evil torture.
Damn it, hold on, I spot my boss, the retard. I need to have a conversation with him. Actually, you know what? Screw it. I don’t feel like dealing with him now. I don’t know if I told you guys about the whole “I’m a trainee” thing. Here’s a summary of it:
When I was hired, I was told that I would be a “trainee” for the first 100 days I was employed (Basma Basma told me this). Fair enough (even though the motherfuckers didn’t train me for shit). Anyway, so 100 days in the retards still didn’t confirm me. I go to HR and ask about my confirmation. And HR gives me the regular shitty excuses for not doing their work:
“Oh its with Mahmood Mahmood.”
Okay. Mahomood, where is it?
“Uhhh.. duhhhh… I don’t have it, that’s not my job. Basma Basma is supposed to have it.”
Okay. Basma, where’s my confirmation?
“Ummm…. I don’t have it. Blah blah… is supposed to have it. You go and come back later.”
Okay. Weeks of me going and 7inning pass to no avail. Just more excuses…like “it got lost, we need to print it again”.
Until one day, basically, 2 months late. They give me my confirmation letter. Time to celebrate, you’d think. But noooooooooooooo. The shiteaters give me a confirmation letter that says my confirmed position will be “trainee”. That shit don’t fly with me, bitches. So I go to Basma. And basically ask her in a polite way: “What is this fucking shit? You whore! You said I’d be a trainee for 3 months. And now you give me this shit, 5 months in, that says my job is a “trainee”. I’m going bitchslap seven shades of shit out of you, you gimpish streetwalker! ”
She goes on to defend her position to say that “she never said that” (the lying whore). And that their policy is you’re a trainee for 6 months. And if I want to become a “full-fledged employee” in my unit before the 6 months, that my GM has to write some kind of recommendation.
Fine, off I go to my boss, the retard. And I tell him that he has to write HR a recommendation. And he is like “yeah sure! whatever you need darling! flippity flippity! faggoty fag! I’m just going to talk to the pimp of HR, and ask him what he recommends your official position should be.”
Ummmm…. okay… just get it done.
So days pass and I get an email from my boss to go see the HR pimp. So I go. Now, you’d think that when you have problems with a whore like Basma her pimp would take care of it. But again, noooooooooooooooooo. This guys makes I am Sam look like a genius.
Okay, so I explain my story to the pimp. “Basma said this when I was hired, and now she’s saying this. Whats the dealio, yo?” The pimp decides to avoid the question.
“Why are you concerned about your official designation? You should be concerned about your work! Your job title isn’t important.”
“I’m concerned about my job title, because it IS important. Maybe not to you it isn’t, but to me it is, motherfucker. And don’t you worry your trashy little ass about my work, everybody says my work is damn fine, ask anybody. Now, like I said what’s the deal?”
Again he avoids the question. “You’re still on the learning curve *simulates a wave with his hands*. You should be concerned about your learning.”
Me: “What learning curve motherfucker? You couldn’t teach a chimp to scratch his ass. Now, again I’ve been here long enough to no longer be considered a trainee.
Pimp: Do you do work?
Me: Hell yeah, motherfucker. Do you, asshair?
Him: Like what do you do?
Me: I do *name multiple projects*. *Pimp swallows his tongue and shuts the fuck up*So one last time, jackass, what is your real policy? 100 days? 6 months? What is the motherfucking deal?”
Pimp: “Well…. umm…. there is no time limit to you being a trainee….”
Me: “What the fuck? You’ve got to be shitting me! So you can technically keep me a trainee for 2 years-”
Pimp: “No we wouldn’t do that-”
Me: “How the fuck can I believe that when you have no fucking written policy and all of you pieces of horse shit lie to me about everything? How the hell am I supposed to know when I’m no longer a trainee?”
Pimp: “Well, that’s up to your boss… he recommends you.”
Me: “Thats what I’m telling you, you fucking retard! My GM was supposedly just going to ask you my official designation. What the fuck did you say?”
Pimp: “Uhhh… I said you should stay a trainee.”
Me: “But that’s technically not your decision is it?”
Pimp: “No… its your GM’s decision.”
Me: “Why the hell am I talking to a dipshit like you then?” *get up and leave*
Baby Jesus Christ, do you guys see the fucked-up retards I have to deal with? And you ask why I’m so frustrated and violent. If I wasn’t surrounded by “people” like this I would be so much more pleasant.
Anyway, so now I’m at a point where I have to go and talk to my boss and tell him to send them a motherfucking recommendation. The thing is I’m not a complete idiot and I know the only reason my boss got the pimp involved in the first place is to have him tell me the bad news of not changing my status. That’s how my boss works: He pretends to be all nice to you but then he gets other people to do his dirty work so you can’t blame him. Sly dirty motherfucker. But that shit don’t fly with me, I’m just trying to compose myself so that I don’t knock his cocky ass out when I’m talking to him. So I need to talk to him… and I know what I’m going to say and everything, but whenever I see him, I get this uncontrollable urge to spit at him. And I can’t do that, because then he definitely won’t recommend me.
I know what I write about work can get me fired, and there’s probably some guy from IT reading all of this right now, but honestly, I don’t care. And honestly, if you jerkoffs actually ran this business semi-professionally I wouldn’t be writing all this. But all of you deserve to lose your silly ass jobs, if you what to call the cocksucking you do a job. Fuck all of you! I hate all you people that work here! Die! Die! Die!
*Long sigh* Ahhhhhhhhhh…….. I feel soooo much better now that I got all that out. No wonder they say writing is therapeutic. There’s nothing more therapeutic than writing swearwords about people you hate.
Anyway…. lets get to the fun parts!
6 Weirdest Foods
For all you people that drink pepsi….etc.
You know what would be funny?
For all you guys out there – your dream job
I want one of these soooo bad
CarDust Pictures – For Tooomz
I’m sooooooooo going to buy one of these and carry it with me. There are so many bitches I could use it on. Kuwait is full of them.
And last but not least. A Mini Retarded Video! This is why I think wreslting is for kids and retards:
See? A nice long post to make up for the missed ones. Don’t say I don’t treat you nice. I treat you as nice as I would any other homeless people I know. With that, I’m off. To do what? I don’t know. I live my life on the edge… not knowing whats going to happen from one minute to the next! Crazy, I know! But that’s how I roll! Whoop whoop!