“Whatcha gonna do now, bitch!”

September 30, 2007

Hi there kiddos!

I’ve been found out! My boss informed me today that I am the 2nd highest user of the internet of this wonderful institution (And where I work is pretty big). I think I should get an award. My boss doesn’t feel the same way. So anyway, I have to stop using the internet. But don’t worry I’m planning to bring my laptop to work from now on, with my own internet connection. And that way I can blog, watch porn, and work at the same time, and nobody can say a single thing to me! Hooray! Hooray!

So anyway chicos and chicas, I’m not going to be posting for a couple of days until I get things in order, ok?

Oh yeah, before I sign off, I have to tell you that along with the whole “don’t use the internet” conversation came me exposing Rafeek for the rat that he is. Basically, not much came from it. He was just told not to do it again. But while he was being “told off” I was sitting right there staring at him with the an expression on my face that conveyed the message “Whatcha gonna do now, bitch!”. That makes it soooo worth it.

Can you read that Rafeek? You spying motherfucker! Don’t fucking touch my computer again! I’ll break your stubby little fingers, you bastard! And you know how I’ll do it? I’ll walk in and see you typing, grab the keyboard from under your fingers, and using the keyboard I’m gonna smash those stubby little fuckers into pulp! Pulp, motherfucker! Pulp! Pulp so fine I’m gonna drink that shit when I’m done! *I spit at you*

Oh yeah, I’m not getting the office I told you guys about, fucking red tape. So what if “new senior management” is being hired? What the hell does that mean? “New senior management” my ass. Just because they get paid more and work more than me doesn’t make them more valuable than me. Well, then again, I guess it does, but I provide this place with laughter and happiness, and you can’t put a price on that *sob*.

Anyway, its time for me to go, those internet minutes just keep racking up (hmmm…. maybe if I get 1st place they’ll give me a cake….Mmmm…cake….)

Goodbye my children, see you in a little while.



Ninja Chicken



Good One, Dad



Interview Tip






It was too late before they realized….



Twin Fun



Bands that Rock




12 Responses to ““Whatcha gonna do now, bitch!””

  1. N. said

    “get things in order”? What things? Getting your laptop and an internet connection shouldn’t take more than a day.

    You know what I like about you? Your sadism. But the way you spoke to Rafeek the other day, you were so polite telling him to log out of your computer. lol! Why was there no bashing of stubby fingers then? :/ So disappointing!

  2. chikapappi said

    Someone called “chika”!!!

    WOW! Today’s post was a bit “graphic” I really hate this effin a-hole Rafeek!

    GIRL! you are nuts! :)

  3. kilo said

    u seem like a 22 y/o kid who still listens to 2pac… early in “da mo`nin”

  4. noura said

    u seriously deserve a plaque!! i’m so making you one and you MUST display it in your make believe office

  5. That was great! Way to vent out, Random!
    And what’s with the counting minutes?? Seriously, doesnt the company have anything better to do?

  6. Swair said

    Company Head Dude #1: “Hey, let’s go thank Prophet for the porn she downloaded for us..”

    Company Head Dude #2: “Naah, she exposed Raffik, and now i’m pissed at the mofo for looking bad in front of the employees.. can’t use him as a spy anymore..”

    CHD #1: “Hmm.. how about we tell her about her internet minutes?”

    CHD #2: “That ought to make her happy! then we’ll tell her NOT to use up any more of our internet… hahahaha that is so evil!!”

    (a few minutes later)

    *Prophet blogs about bringing her own laptop & porn= no more sharing with CHDs*

    CHD #2: damn!

  7. Swair said

    P.S. yes, my mind wanders..

    and don’t u think it’s Rafeek who’s been finishing up your internet minutes? or is he number 1?

  8. Tooomz said

    Second best? Second best?! Is that how you want to be remembered??? Quitters don’t win! Leave that laptop and work at being #1!

    P.S. Swair that was hilarious..I wonder if he really is #1.

  9. Prophet of Random said

    N.: Yeah, I enjoy my sadism as well. And you’re right, I don’t follow through with my thoughts. There are just two small things that stop me from implementing my sadist thoughts: prison and capital punishment.

    Kilo: I am not a 22 year old kid, I am a 23 year old woman, thank you very much. And don’ be dissin’ my ghettoness or tupac (he was prophetic). Continue to diss and I will have to label you as a 21 year old retard.

    Swair: Loool. And I don’t think Rafeek is number one. After some thought, its probably bandwidth consumption that determines “best internet user of the year”. I think I got 2nd place cuz I’ve downloaded 300 songs here at work. I think the 1st place guy has been download full length movies, possibly of an adult-nature. I do not know. But anyway, the first place guy is probably doing one heck of alotta downloading.

    Tooomz: I know, there can be only 1! But I always thought that it had to be Duncan McCloud, the Highlander. I’ll never beat him….

  10. N. said

    I dedicate this to you, lol

  11. Prophet of Random said

    Thanks for the dedication N. : Me likes.

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